Perfectly true

Girls- Here is some simple dating advice

The Ugly Truth...is it true?

Last Friday, Lauren Nutt and I attended an advanced screening of "The Ugly Truth." The movie was hilarious and a bit " OMG, did they really just say that." While watching the movie, I started thinking about myself in terms of dating. The character played by Gerard Butler explains that a woman must be a mix of "sinner and saint." That the trashy girl in the bar may get a guys attention, but he will never keep her around. However, the sweet girl that cooks for Grandma must also be comfortable with herself and adventurous enough to try new things. Then, like all chick flicks... the lesson ends in the result of the teacher loving the student for who she really is ( can somebody say "he's just not that into you".) Yet, I think there is an important lesson here. You should always "date" the person you're seeing. Yes, wearing comfy cozies on the couch and watching Jeopardy is allowed, but you can also still hit the treadmill and apply some make-up when going out for drinks. Fellas...this rule applies to you as well. You may have gone on 4 dates in one week, but bringing a girl breakfast in bed never killed anyone.
XOXO

Jessi Marquez

Girls Night?

The long awaited ultimate chick flick is finally available!

So grab your favorite girls

a bottle of wine ( or boxed wine if you wanna keep it classy)

some chocolate and strawberries

and pick up your copy here:

It's called a break up because its broken

It seems as though the month of February has been more about break ups than love. Facebook is the obvious indicator of this trend, by notifying me that a good heap of my friends have a change in "relationship status..." including Facebook celeb Justin Ross Lee. This got me thinking a lot about relationships, the course they take, and break ups. 

A metaphor I once read that I felt is very appropriate goes like this:

You start off both driving brand new shiny cars. It's everything you ever dreamed of! You can't even believe that it's finally yours. Then somewhere down the road you start to drive at different speeds. He turns left, you turn right. Then one day CRASH! It came out of nowhere, you were completely blind sided. Then insurance comes along, and one of you decide to try your luck and get a NEW shiny car, while the other one is trying to repair the broken one. 

I think this is a great metaphor because the thing that we often forget is that, if only one of you is willing to "fix it" you may be left in the dust. 

Here's the good news... while fixing the car, you realize all that you are capable of. The thing's that you were able to stand through, the support you offered, and the thing's you expect from...well a car. The thing is, you and your ex no longer share the belief that it's worth fixing. Besides, who wants a car that even after repair still stalls when you try to shift gears.

I am not saying break ups are easy, they can be one of the hardest thing's to endure. It almost seems as though every nerve in your body has to feel that heartbreak. However, you have to stop and think that this person you were dating...they took a long look at you and the relationship, and thought "No, thanks. I'll try my luck elsewhere." This is the most painful part, and the most rewarding. Anyone who assesses you or your relationship as disposable is not worthy of your time or tears.

Okay, still not working....Well how about a to do/ not to do list to guide you through this!

DO:

1. Have a ladies night (or guys night)- there is something about being with your friends and not having to impress the opposite sex that feels wonderful.

2. Do hang out and meet new people - For girls that can mean a lacrosse party, for guys a strip club. Just remember in all cases, don't say I love you.

3. Workout! This is the time to focus on how sexy and amazing you are. Nothing screams I'm over you then flat abs this summer, plus working out makes you feel great!

4. Read "It's called a break up because it's broken" and write a journal

DON'T:

1. Eat a gallon of ice cream. He's not waiting for you at the bottom, and would you really want to date a guy named Ben or a guy named Jerry.

2. Watch every chick flick ever made. That is not real life! I hate to be this honest but Matthew McConaughey probably isn't going to ask you to dinner. Plus, that takes time away from you meeting that guy (or girl) that will treat you wonderful.

3. Check his facebook profile a million times, and look through old pictures. Go out and make new memories.

4. Read: How to get your lover back. Let's be honest... if he isn't going to do everything to get you back, then you don't want him! 

( I'll still include the link because some of you never listen)

And if all else fails, you can try what this girl has done: 31 dates in 31 days

http://31datesin31days.blogspot.com/

Love always ( don't you hate that)

Jessi

Love Sick

Some quotes if you are in love....ew!

"Do you ever put your arms out and just spin and spin and spin? Well that's what love is like. Everything inside of you tells you to stop before you fall, but you just keep on going." - Practical Magic

"There must be something between us, even if it's only an ocean." - An Affair to Remember

"When you love someone, and you love them with all your heart, it never disappears when you're apart. And when you love someone and you've done all you can do, you set them free, and if that love was true...when you love someone it will all come back to you." - Forget Paris

"Sometimes I wake up before you do and I watch you sleep and I'm overwhelmed because you're so amazing and I don't know why I'm lucky enough to have you in my life; that you're here with me. And I know that I want to spend the rest of my life trying to make you as happy as you make me." - Alias

"Thinking bout every little thing we ever did crazy. Sipping on that memory lane, that lane never closes, seven days of the week I can drive in my sleep cause I've got dreams of love and I love you. I know you feel the same way too. I feel your spirit when you're near me and when you're away. Somehow, somewhere I'll see you again, but until then I've got dreams of loving you." - Gavin DeGraw

"Ever since I was young I never understood anything about the world, and I never understood anything that happened in my life. The only thing that ever made sense to me was you, and how I felt about you. That's all I've ever known and that's enough, that's enough for me for the rest of my life." - Boy Meets World

"I'm just saying thank you. You reminded me of what I'm capable of feeling. It's like I was walking around seeing my life through a smudged window, and then I saw you and the smudges were gone. The window was clean." - Dawson's Creek

"You and I are meant to be together. Period. The end. Cue happy ending music." - Dawson's Creek

"I love you in a really really big, pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you." - Grey's Anatomy

"I'm not here to tell you I can't live without you. I can live without you. I just don't want to." - Rumor Has It

"Maybe getting over someone you're in love with isn't impossible. Unless, maybe you don't actually get over it. Maybe you just learn to live with it." - Felicity

"You were like coming up for fresh air. It's like I was drowning and you saved me. It's all I know." - Grey's Anatomy

"I don't wanna waste anymore of my life without you in it." - Garden State

"For a kiss to be really good, you want it to mean something. You want it to be with someone you can't get out of your head, so that when your lips finally touch, you feel it everywhere. A kiss so hot and so deep, you never to come up for air. You can't cheat your first kiss. Trust me, you don't want to. Cause when you find that right person for a first kiss, it's everything." - Grey's Anatomy

"Well it was a million tiny little things that, when you add them up, they meant that we were supposed to be together, and I knew it. I knew it the very first time I touched her. It was like coming home, only to no home I'd ever known. I was just taking her hand to help her out of a car, and I knew it. It was like magic." - Sleepless in Seattle

"Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say, find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is, there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love, well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived." - Meet Joe Black

"And then I look over at you, and I am blinded, I'm blinded. You are six inches from my face and you are so fucking beautiful, I can't even focus my eyes." - P.S.

"Growing up sucks. Not all kisses are magic, and most boys do not live up to your expectations. But there are those times, when everything, I mean love, romance, relationships, it all falls together perfectly. And it's incredible. It's those moments, no matter how depressingly few and far between, that make growing up worth it." - Dawson's Creek

"I think I'd miss you even if we'd never met." - The Wedding Date

"I can hear her heart beat for a thousand miles. And the heavens open everytime she smiles. And when I come to her that's where I belong. Yes, I'm running to her like a river's song." - Van Morrison

"Will you be my shoulder when I'm gray and older? Promise me tomorrow starts with you. Getting high, running wild among the stars above. Sometimes it's hard to believe you remember me." - James Blunt

"Like a moth to a flame, like a song without a name, I've never been the same since I met you." - Eric Clapton

"I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it." - City of Angels

"And it's frightening for me to be swimming in this strange sea, but I'd rather be here than on land. Yeah, she's all that I see, and she's all that I need, and I'm out of my league once again." - Stephen Speaks

"And where was I before the day that I first saw your lovely face? Now I see it everyday and I know that I am the luckiest. And in a white sea of eyes, I see one pair that I recognize, and I know that I am the luckiest. I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you." - Ben Folds

"All the lights are on and you are alive. But you can't point the way to your heart. So sublime, when the stars are aligned. But you don't know the greatness you are." - Cary Brothers

"I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images and when we kiss they're perfectly aligned. And I have to speculate that God himself did make us into corresponding shapes like puzzle pieces from the clay. True, it may seem like a stretch, but it's thoughts like this that catch my troubled head when you're away, when I am missing you to death." - Iron and Wine

"I remember thinking I'll go on forever only knowing I'll see you again. But I know the touch of you is so hard to remember, but like that touch I know no other. And for sure we have danced in the risk of each other. Would you like to dance around the world with me?" - Dave Matthews Band

"You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you, Peter Pan. That's where I'll be waiting." - Hook

"She's gone. She gave me a pen. I gave her my heart, and she gave me a pen." - Say Anything

"What I really want to do with my life, what I want to do for a living, is I want to be with your daughter. I'm good at it." - Say Anything

"You said you couldn't be with someone who didn't believe in you. Well I believed in you. I just didn't believe in me. I love you. Always." - Pretty in Pink

"I want a serious girlfriend. Somebody I can love, that's gonna love me back. Is that psycho?" - Sixteen Candles

"You treated me rough. That was the worst time of my life. I didn't care what other people said, I just wanted you near me. I still have faith, faith in the both of us. I still believe in you. You gave me all your love. You made me pure inside. I can't believe we are over, but your love did me so good. After all the things you've done, many people can't believe it, but I can. I still believe in you." - Gavin DeGraw

"You're not perfect, sport. And let me save you the suspense. This girl you met, she's not perfect either. But the question is, whether or not you're perfect for each other." - Good Will Hunting

"Have you ever felt like you were just really meant to be with somebody? Like your whole life was just kind of this big mess that just kinda kept happening up until the day when this unbelievable person came into your life, and then suddenly, you know, you didn't feel so lost anymore. You felt like everything you thought you'd been doing wrong in your life, you're actually doing it right, because that whole time she was coming closer to you. You just weren't smart enough to know it, or brave enough to just tell her." - The Third Wheel

"Look, I guarantee there'll be tough times. I guarantee that at some point, one or both of us is gonna want to get out of this thing. But I also guarantee that if I don't ask you to be mine, I'll regret it for the rest of my life, because I know, in my heart, you're the only one for me." - Runaway Bride

"I love you. Not like they told you love is, and I didn't know this either, but love don't make things nice; it ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We aren't here to make things perfect. The snowflakes are perfect. The stars are perfect. Not us. Not us! We are here to ruin ourselves and to break our hearts and love the wrong people and die. The storybooks are bullshit." - Moonstruck

"Someday love will find me in the rough. Someday love will finally be enough. I shine a little more lately." - Anna Nalick

"I know in the past I've caused you pain and I'm sorry. And I'll always be sorry until the day I die. And I hate this pen I'm holding because I should be holding you. I hate this paper under my hand because it isn't you. I even hate this letter because it's not the whole truth. Because the whole truth is so much more than a letter can even say. If you want to hate me, go ahead. If you want to burn this letter, do it. You could burn the whole world down; you could tell me to go to hell. I'd go, if you wanted me to. And I'd send you a letter from there." - My So-Called Life

"We ended up having one of those conversations where you feel like there is no use hiding anything anymore, you've just given yourself so entirely to the other person that you feel like running around your apartment and opening up your drawers and closets and cabinets and pulling out all sorts of shameful things and arraying them on the bedspread and shouting, 'Look at this! And this! But love me!'" - The Big Love

We are just not that into you

Here is a little note I wrote back in 2007, before books on break-ups were now movies....

Enjoy!!

The book of Black and White....right?

I recently had been thinking about relationships...how they work, the process, the games. Everyone proclaiming to hate the game and inevitability not be able to avoid it. Thing's changed from simple to hard in such a few amount of years.
When you were younger you wrote in a box :
I like you, do you like me?? Check Yes_No_Maybe_
and by lunchtime you were dating.
Now thing's have become so complicated that there is a book for every question, every method, and every kind of relationship out there. But how do these books pinpoint the answers to your relationship problems, if half the time the problem is that you can't address that there is a problem.

I feel like this age is the most complicated, it's filled with gray and murky situations. There is no such thing as casually dating without being called a slut, or hurting someones feelings. There are no more dinner and movies. And the waiting three days to call the person theory no longer applies because you have been friended on facebook by the time that person had drunkenly walked into their house.

How do you define if you are:
a)hooking up
b) dating casually
c) dating exclusively
or
e)the prospect of the above three choices.

I find myself and my friends in many similar situations where you are often unable to define what exactly your in, which is hard in a definition world. A creepy guy approaches you in a bar and asks to buy you a drink,while you are standing with a guy that you have been "casually dating" for 2 years, and the proper response is clearly "This is my brother".

No one ever wants to be hurt and the prospect of a new relationship can be scary, but for how long do you do gray. If he/she acts like your boyfriend/girlfriend and isn't hooking up with anyone then shouldn't that equal possible future?
POSTED BY JESSI AT 4:04 PM June 27th, 2007

Hope you enjoyed! Love ya- Jessi Marquez

http://libella7.blogspot.com/2007/06/black-and-white.html

Broken Periscope

Spinning around my head
Tires in a figure eight
Through the hourglass crack in the wall
I see your big lips like a Wales mouth

Once we were
Two peas in a pod
Now I’m a pea on a spoon
Prepared to be devoured
By your tooth ache on big jaws

Puzzle pieces not cut to fit
Two straws with blocked ends
A keyhole with no key
An anchor with no ship to restrain

Closed eyelids I experience the sun passing by a window
Shadows with the glimmer of illumination
Wearing broken sunglasses
Dark tunnel entrance, into the forest
Intersection
Roads meeting
Falling pine tree blocks the way

Your shoes, Your dog, Your owl eyes
Your finger holding a fish hook
The way your face contorts
When making that look

Lightning hit me
I’m jumping in a hole
Hungry baby bird
With no where to go
The world’s best periscope
Given to the blindest man

-Sommer 9/25/05

Find this Quote

I will send a $50 gift card to whoever can find out who made this quote...

"Love is how you feel about yourself when you are with the other person."